Today's

Top 100's

Cartoons

My Mom is a Fob

Passive Aggressive

Help Feed the Troll

Habitation of Justice

15 Minute Lunch

Getting Weirder

Some Life!

Jokes

Teacher: "Name two pronouns?"

Little Johnny: "Who? Me?"

Sperm jokes

A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital donation center.

Man: "What are you doing here today?"

Woman: "Oh, I'm here to donate some blood. They're going to give me $5 for it."

Man: "Hmm, that's interesting. I'm here to donate sperm, myself. But they pay me $25."

The woman looked thoughtful for a moment and they chatted some more before going their separate ways.

Several months later, the same man and woman meet again in the donation center.

Man: "Oh, hi there! Here to donate blood again?"

Woman: [shaking her head with mouth closed] "Unh unh."

Woman jokes

Why shouldn't women be able to drive?

There are no roads from the bedroom to the kitchen!

Sex jokes

A lonely woman, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married. She put an ad in the local paper that read:

HUSBAND WANTED!
MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's),
MUST NOT BEAT ME,
MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME,
AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!
ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON.

On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman with no arms or legs sitting in a wheelchair. The old woman said, "You're not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you ... you have no legs!" The old man smiled, "Therefore I cannot run around on you!"

She snorted. "You don't have any hands either!" Again the old man smiled, "Nor can I beat you!"

She raised an eyebrow and gazed intently. "Are you still good in bed?" With that, the old gentleman leaned back, beamed a big broad smile and said, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"

Love jokes

What's the difference between love, true love and showing off?

Spitting, swallowing and gargling.

President jokes

The President was out walking on a beautiful snowy day, when he saw that somebody had urinated on the White House lawn to spell out "The President Sucks."

Infuriated, he called on the secret service to figure out who had done it. In a few hours, they came to him and told him that there was some bad news and some worse news.

"The bad news is that the urine is from the Vice President."

"Al? How could you do this to me? What could be worse than this?"

"The handwriting's the first lady's."

Hooker jokes

What does bungee jumping and hookers have in common?

They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks, you're screwed.

Man jokes

How are men and parking spaces alike?

The good ones are always taken and the free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely small.

Hymn jokes

Why do they say 'Amen' at the end of a prayer instead of 'Awomen'?

The same reason they sing Hymns instead of Hers!

Jokes

"Do you know why Mickey Mouse bought a telescope?"

"No, why?"

"Because he wanted to see Pluto!"



Yours Truly, myEweb.co - Local Search - Classifieds - Shopping - City Guides - Free Stuff  - Travel - Job Search - References - News - Games

About Us - Term of Use - Privacy Policy